May 2012
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homosaurus-rex:
It’s actually a good thing that the zombie apocalypse starts in Florida because then the zombies only have one way to go and that’s straight up into trigger happy redneck territory. I give it two weeks before monster trucks and mullets save us.
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heysammy:
pizzaforpresident:
So in one week we’ve got three cannibal cases in Florida, a man spitting blood all over a highway patrol officer, another man disemboweling himself and then throwing his intestines at two police officers, and a woman beheading her infant and eating it’s brain…….
#quarantine that fucker jesus christ
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how to kiss
conversationparade:
[step 1] open your mouth as wide as possible. make sure to stick out your tongue as far as you can, too, since kisses are like, 90% that thing
[step 2] find someone to kiss. you will know they want to kiss because their tongue will also be extended at full length
[step 3] move in for the kill
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me: this is a bad idea and will only make me sad
me: okay let's do it
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jamtards:
in her bedroom the mighty bedroom the fangirl blogs tonight
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